» 2011 » April Strangely Diabetic

Oh, and Another Thing

April 27, 2011 — Scott

Last week, I posted about how being sick and stressed really can have an effect on my depression. In thinking about my behavior during that time, I also came to realize that I had started doing something that also had a dramatic effect on me.

My eating habits had become simply atrocious! I’m not talking about pigging out on cupcakes and oatmeal raisin cookies, I’m talking about not eating enough.

Once I had gotten past the worst of the pneumonia (whoa! spelled it right that time!), I really needed to do basal testing. I started doing that, skipping some meals. Well, I was also somewhat weak and didn’t really have that much of an appetite. It’s never been unusual for me to skip breakfast, happens all the time. My lunch is usually a granola bar of some type, but I got to the point where I was skipping lunch as well.

I was feeling really weak and my numbers are all over the place. I ended up with dinner being my only meal many days, and that was usually a lite dinner trying to level out my numbers.

Looking back at it, I was literally down to 30 or 40 carbs a day and I bet my caloric intake wasn’t much above 500 a day.

Good lord, no wonder I continued to feel so weak. I was about ready to go back to the doctor, but when I realized what I had been doing… talk about feeling like an idiot.

So I started eating. Eating more than was “normal” for me, but not going way overboard. Rocking the 70/30 combo bolus on high carb, high fat meals. Using my Symlin more consistently and actually increasing the dosage on those big meals.

And lo and behold! Not only did I start to physically feel better, but my numbers started to level out as well. Chinese food that would always send me up to the 400 range? Barely broke 200, twice last week. Double Quarter Pounder and Large Fries (oh those evil, but tasty fries)? Same deal. They got pwned.

I’ve started trying to drop back into a more “normal” pattern for me, trying to run at about 100 or so carbs a day, more protein and fatty foods. Being more aware of how food affects me and what I can do to overcome that. Trying to keep my numbers under 200 post meal as often as I can while not having hypo events. I haven’t had many hypo events since I got my basals re-tuned, but that “under 200″ is quite an accomplishment for me.

That is something I have struggled with since I started pumping. So maybe being sick wasn’t as bad of an experience as I thought it was at the time; I seemed to have gotten some benefit from it. Ahhh… Screw that noise, it still sucked!

Scott

Today’s snarky comment: Wow, that post sounded almost upbeat! Ok, who am I and what have I done with Scott?

Posted in dblog diabetes support, depression, diet. 12 Comments »

Tools of the Trade

April 26, 2011 — Scott

Now, we all use tools every single day.. Looking at my desk, I see car keys, pens, glucometer, keyboard, mouse, monitor, phone, documentation… all things designed to help us do other things, hopefully easier than we could without them; that’s what tools do.

And, when it comes to diabetes, there is another set of tools that are made available to us. These tools are readily available via the internet and traditional media outlets (TV, print, radio).

What kind of Tools are these you ask? Are you already using them? Well, as my friend Kelly over at Diabetesaliciousness™ described in discovering one such tool, I certainly hope you are not.

The Tools I am discussing are the Tools that insist in preying on the fears and hopes of people with diabetes, and other chronic conditions as well I’m willing to bet. These Tools keep touting their latest “cure”, their latest way to “reverse” diabetes.

Every time one of these Tools gets spotted in the wild, someone will call them on it. Often triggering more and more torque to the situation; hoping to give these Tools a clue. Hoping to at least help them learn to use the words “control” or “manage” instead of “cure” or “reverse”.

These Tools are liars, predators of those who may be looking for a glimpse of hope, something to hold on to as they navigate through a lifetime of stress, worry, idiotic medical professionals and clueless insurance companies.

George recently described his encounter with one such idiotic medical professional over at Ninjabetic, go read it… I’ll wait… <whistles nonchalantly> Back? I mean seriously, is it any wonder that the media is full of Tool-inspired stories when Tools like that are around? There are no telling how many patients have left their Tools appointments just as angry as George was.

A while back, I made a very glib posting about the Reader’s Digest story. These types of things were just so ludicrous, it was a time when I just needed to laugh it off. I was wrong, they are ludicrous, but they are no laughing matter. This post may also seem glib, but applying the word “tool” to an individual or organization conveys a certain slang meaning, which I feel is totally appropriate. I mean seriously, are the these folks dicks or what?

Hmmm… maybe this post needs a different title… Tirade of the Tools… Parade of Tools… I don’t know. oh well, you know what I mean, dontcha?

I guess it’s up to us to keep calling the Tools out when we see one. Walking the wall, so to speak.

Hey Tools! Yea you! Not on our watch. Punks.

Scott

Posted in Advocacy, challenges, dblog diabetes support. 7 Comments »

Once More Into the Breach, Dear Friends

April 21, 2011 — Scott

That quote from the 3rd Act of Shakespeare’s King Henry V is talking about valor; about doing things you don’t want to do but must.

I’m not sure if valor really applies to this, but it seems I put myself in the breach way too often. And my breach is depression.

This often happens to me when I get sick, and if you read my last post and have had the chance to read other recent posts, you may have noticed that the last two or three months have been a bit rocky for me. I’ve started really pulling back from people, both on-line and off, and this is one of my surefire tells that I am having a depressive episode.

They happen, I think, not because of stress or illness, instead they occur because I will often stop taking my medications when I get sick or am under a lot of stress. When I have both in play, its a pretty safe bet that I have stopped somewhere along the line.

I’m not talking about insulin or managing my diabetes, I just do that anymore. Tho, to be honest, my language is often a lot more “colorful” than normal.

I’m talking about my blood pressure meds, the ones for my reflux & cholesterol, and most importantly my antidepressants. I look at those bottles in the morning and then just go on like they are not even there. And then, after a week or three, I’ll really start feeling down, which just makes it harder for me to start again. I’ll finally admit to myself what is going on and then get mad at myself because it literally took years to find the right medications and I just stopped for no real reason.

I’m sure there really is a reason of some type, but I’ll be damned if I can figure it out.

Then I get mad at myself again when I realize how far I’ve pulled away; away from friends who would support me, who would help me thru this rocky time.

All I can do is start them again, wait for them to start working again. I don’t want to, but I have to

Hopefully, I won’t be overrun by the French before that happens…

Posted in dblog diabetes support, depression. 15 Comments »

What I Learned Being Sick

April 14, 2011 — Scott

I recently had “something” that took two months, six doctor visits, five different antibiotics and a case of pneumonia to clear up. Throw in a couple of “dubious” bottles of insulin and you’ve got a good recipe for a higher than normal (for me) A1c. My last A1c was the highest it’s been since I started pumping two-and-a-half years ago. Oh well, the deck was just a little stacked against me.

Around the 1st of February, my numbers started to run higher than normal, thought I might be catching something so I just corrected as needed. When the illness never seemed to materialize (enter the first dubious vial of insulin), I started making adjustments to basals and bolus rates to get me back on track. After messing with that for a week or so, I actually started to get sick around the 3rd week of February.

I let it brew for a few days, in case it was a virus, but finally went and got meds to treat a case of bronchitis. It seemed to do the trick, but about a week after the antibiotics I got bronchitis again. So more meds and, again, it seemed to clear up.

A few days after that, I started coming down with a head cold/sinus infection. So I went and got a different antibiotic (number 2) this time, but after a few days I was feeling worse, so yet a different one (number 3). A few days later I am feeling even worse. My doctor hears pneumonia in my lungs and gives me an antibiotic shot (number 4) and an oral one (number 5). She tells me that if I am not feeling better in 2 days to go to the ER, otherwise come back for a follow up.

At 2 days, I was feeling somewhat better, I had taken a couple days and slept for most of them along with sleeping for most of that weekend. At my followup, she said that she could still hear some (and seemed half tempted to scold me for not going to the ER, but she didn’t), but I seemed to be recovering and to finish my antibiotics and get as much rest as I could.

During this period, I was running at a +40% basal rate, just to keep the numbers somewhere around 200. I also learned a new trick that helped with meals, I also started adding 40% to my carb counts. I didn’t really feel like eating, but knew I’d end up DKA if I didn’t, so I ate. And always had serious spikes. Upping the carb count seemed to help out in that regards quite a bit.

And, finally, I started feeling better and was able to stop using the temp basals I had been using.

At this point, do any of you remember that I had changed my basals and bolus settings back before I really started “feeling” sick? I didn’t and it took me a few days to figure out why the hell I was now having unexpected lows.

Oh well, I’m almost back to my cranky old self, so stay off my grass! Actually, I’m still too tired to really give a damn…

Thanks for stopping by

Scott

Posted in dblog diabetes support. 3 Comments »

Meeting the Parents

April 7, 2011 — Scott

** Please forgive the brevity of this post and the lack of links to other great #JDRFGovDay posts; but I am really under the weather and also really wanted to get this done. Honestly, I really wanted to have it out there a week or two ago and I fear that I won’t really be able to do the experience the justice is deserves.

As I finish my series of posts about JDRF Government Day(s), I wanted to discuss the wonderful T3′s that I encountered there. Some of them were diabetic themselves and at breakfast Sunday morning, as we all stood to briefly introduce ourselves and explain why we were there, there was an incredible story from every single person. Some were tear-jerking, others inspirational. But the one thing they all had in common was that they were there for their loved ones; whether they’re still children or grown with children of their own.

But they were also there for those diabetics who are living day-to-day with diabetes; most of whom do not see how much effort everyone at the JDRF puts into research and advocacy for all diabetics.

This is where the DOC and the JDRF meet; right at the point where we want life to be better for all of us.

As I’ve mentioned in previous posts; there were entire decades where I did nothing to truly manage my condition and there is no logical reason that I should even be sitting here writing this right now. I was so alone in this; the depression, guilt, anger. It wasn’t till I found the DOC that I could actually start to reach some type of acceptance.

Until very recently, I was unable to read blogs by parents about the tribulations, not only of their CWD, but also the ones themselves experienced. They always upset me as I saw that child’s future thru the lenses of my past. And I would not wish that type of life on anyone; it was barely an existence, let alone a life.

It was survivor’s guilt and I was finally able to forgive myself for surviving. Lorraine over at This is Caleb was an incredible help to me in this regard. She may not realize it, but Lorraine? Thank you so much.

And all the parents I met in Washington? Thank you as well, you’ve given me a fresh perspective on life with diabetes. One that I was sorely lacking before. Everyone of us wants a cure, that’s a given. But what we want most of all is for our children, with or without diabetes, to have the best life that they can.

Even if the cure never arrives, we can give our kids the best we can.

Let’s all do that

Scott

** Disclaimer: The JDRF covered my travel, hotel and meal expenses for this trip to Washington, DC. They did not ask me to blog or not to blog about my experiences and these were my own thoughts and opinions **

Posted in dblog diabetes support, JDRF #JDRFGocDay. 16 Comments »

Srsly?

April 6, 2011 — Scott

Since so many people have so elegantly explained to Reader’s Digest that they may be suffering from recto-cranial insertion in regards to their “Reversing Diabetes” edition, I decided to take a slightly different, more visual, approach