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The Blame Game

Once again, I am going to dive into blame, guilt and diabetes.  But for the first time, I’m not blaming myself or feeling guilty about having diabetes.

This time I am blaming insulin, and doubt if that little b***h feels one bit of guilt.  And therein lies the story

Circa Mid-February, 2011

Time for a new vial of insulin, like countless times before. My numbers had been running higher than normal for the last few days and I had just attributed that to stress (on a scale of 1 to 10, my stress was rated at a 3,432 on the Holy Crap, You’re Stressed scale).  And on into February, the stress increased and my numbers trailed right along.  After a few more days of this, I changed by Dexcom High Alarm from 200 to 300 because I was fucking tired of hearing it go off.

On into early March, another new vile vial and the numbers stay consistently high, running right around 200.   Then comes the weekend for the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation Government Outreach Day(s) and time for the DOC Blogger roundtables (There were actually 2 roundtable sessions, but the second hasn’t found it’s way onto the intrawebz yet).  A little stress before a presentation is normal for me, but the numbers weren’t.  I’d been through 5 or 6 infusion sets by this time and was running a +80 basal rate and my numbers continued to edge upwards.

After staying up way too late with my blogger comrades I was rewarded with an alarm.  Not only had I hit 300, but I had an up arrow as well.  Realizing that something was really wrong and that I was in the “box”  (I’ll explain that in today’s snarky comment) it finally occurred to me to switch to my back up insulin vial.  And that did it.  3 hours later I am at 116.  I had been spilling large ketones since I switched at about 2am and assume I still was as I went to breakfast, trying to convince my body to go back to burning glucose.  I bet the vial that I had been using before this was from the same lot and had been contributing to the high numbers I had been seeing for weeks.

And of course, the session we bloggers had with Jeffery Brewer was that morning at 9am.  I was definitely not on my best game and felt so bad once it was over that I headed out almost immediately.  I therefore missed the group pictures (word on the street is that I’m going to be photo-shopped into one…).   Kelly Rawlings tweeted that they looked for me but thought I had “disapparated”, to which I replied “more like DKA-apparated”.

Come 10am I had to go to the bathroom for the first time since about 3am, despite the fact I had been drinking as much water as I possibly could, and  I was still spilling ketones.  My sugars though were holding under 150.  I probably should have gone to the ER, but they would have probably wanted to admit me.  I really didn’t need admission, I just needed a few bags of fluids and a little time and just did not want to have to argue with a doctor about it; I absolutely did not have the patience for that discussion.   Granted the ER would have made me feel better a lot faster…

So here’s you, little fucking bottle of insulin, you made me realize that I need to make sure I’m not in the box when I’m having odd issues.  Fucker.


Today’s snarky comment: I hate the phrase “think outside the box”.  The trick is to realize you are in the box in the effing first place, moron!

** Disclaimer:  The JDRF covered my travel, hotel and meal expenses for this trip to Washington, DC.  They did not ask me to blog or not to blog about my experiences and these were my own thoughts and opinions; nor did they endorse the profanity contained herein **

© 2011 Scott Strange, Strangely Diabetic and

  • Oh MAN! That sucks! I’m so sorry! I feel so bad… not that I could have really done anything for you but I was THERE! Although, if it was Monday I was puking, etc and no help to anyone… (TMI? Sorry…) Still – that sucks. D is Biatch. Plain and simple. And it’s timing is always just perfect. Ducking Fiabetes.

  • It is so terribly frustrating to address a trend like this with the wrong course of action. I’ve done it myself many times.

    D would be a lot, lot easier if all the tools we used never failed. But they do.

    Looking forward to seeing the photoshopped image!

    • Scott

      that is one of the concerns I have about the APP, it relies on everything working perfectly every single time.

      We still to realize that it just a machine and as such needs to be monitored

  • I’ve wished for some time that there was/is a way to test insulin.
    Yup, it sucks.

    • Scott

      me too.. we’d need it once in a blue moon. Something single-use, foil-packed, never expires and cheap.

  • Alexis

    That sucks! I agree a way to test insulin and sensors before using them. could you imagine?

    Sorry you had such a rough time, sending over due hugs your way.

    Stupid fuckin VILE.

  • This keeps happening to me on a constant basis. Like every few months!! I keep my insulin refrigerated ALL the time. It is maddening.

    I have no idea why they don’t have some sort of insulin tester. Something that would test it on a scale of good-not so good-bad-shitty.

    another unknown in a sea of unknowns that is D

    • Scully, that’s public disclosure. You have one year to file your patent for the insulin tester.

      • Scott

        can I get a patent and make it public domain?

        • Well, Scully has first shot at it, but the patent owner doesn’t have to exercise any rights at all and can use it to prevent other people from monopolizing it. That’s what U. Toronto wanted to do when they patented insulin and gave Lilly the license for it back in the 20s. Didn’t quite work out that way, though.

          • I guess Colleen was first. Anyway. I smell a Diabetes Mine Design Challenge submission… and it smells like (fresh?) band-aids.

  • That sucks. And it’s even worse because you were trying to do things with JDRF. 🙁 Glad to hear you are doing better now.

  • Ugh, that sucks!!!! I had a similar thing happen to me a few months ago. I couldn’t figure out why I was constantly running high no matter what I did. Even opening a new bottle of insulin didn’t help . . . . until I opened a new bottle from another shipment. (I do my meds by mail-order) Suddenly, I was back on track.

    So here is an interesting question? Do you use Apridra? Could something have gone wrong there? Or do you use a different insulin and this is just a weird coincidence?

    • Scott

      yes, I have been using Apidra for over a year now.. wish I had kept the bottle now to see what lot it was

    • Natalie

      That is the exact reason why I never order insulin by mail-order. You never know what conditions it has been exposed to. I do all my other drugs that way, but I buy my insulin at the corner pharmacy.

      • Scott

        As do I…

  • It sucks that this kind of thing happens, especially when traveling. One of the worst diabetes experiences of my life happened when I was out of town on business and couldn’t get any of my infusion sets to work. Not only was it tiring and anxiety-making, it drained me of the feeling that I had any ability to take care of myself.

    I’m glad you were able to get back to happier BGs.